Truth

I'm going to go ahead and let you think I stabbed you in the back.

Because it's easier than the truth.

The truth is that you're mentally unstable.

And that you need psychiatric help. We both do. We always have.

The truth is that I have no idea what you're talking about.

Call it lying to myself, or call it you being ridiculous. I don't care.

But I can tell you this. If I had stabbed you in the back, I wouldn't care to try to get in contact with you. I wouldn't be worried about you.

And you cannot press charges for this. I am posting on my blog, to be read by whomever chooses to access it. I am not emailing you, I am not calling you. You have been removed from my phone. You have been removed from my speed dial. You were my best friend until your heart and mind became slave to your mental and emotional insecurities.

All I have to say is, have a good life.

You deserve pain.

And don't contact me unless you feel like enlightening me as to what I did that stabbed you in the back.

The End

I had a bad dream last night.

Oh well.

At least all this shit is finally reaching a conclusion.

Finally, I'm free.

Some people aren't worth your time, nor your emotions, nor your friendship.

Sometimes it takes something incredibly painful to realize that.

Hatred helps the grieving process immensely.

YOU WILL NOT MAKE THIS WORTHLESS!

YOU WILL NOT FUCKING MAKE THIS PAIN FOR NOTHING!

Money.... Grrr

I have been spending shitloads of money lately.

I know I have! And it's so unlike me!

Although I spent nearly nothing last quarter. I think I spent abouot $160 the whole quarter, and all on piercings and jewelry.

This quarter? My god!

So I sat down yesterday and wrote out all the money I've spent and some random money I'd received. The random money does not include my bi-weekly paycheck from work.

Here is what I found.

Lately (not including the $5 spent at hookah and $30 for hair dye or $32 for Decemberists tix or $50 for other things....courtesy of Trudgen):

-$95 Portable Hard Drive

-$10 earrings at the ren faire

-$4 Taco Bell

-$5 Cold Stone

-$10 Pains of Being Pure At Heart show

-$14 Audrye Sessions show

-$52 Yeah Yeah Yeahs tickets

(-$165) tattoo

(-$30+) merch at Audrye Sessions show

(-$40+) merch at Decemberists show

[parentheses indicate estimates]

Money that has/will come in:

+$200 from OSU (fees adjustment)

(+$170) from Ross (for textbooks)

So, all in all, I have spent/will spend $55

And none of that taking into account money from work!

And I already have enough money saved up for Lebanon!

How the fuck that happened, I have no idea!

How 'bout that for a pick-me-up! ^_^